On another note, I�ve kicked the little white light switches this weekend, which wasn�t fun. It�s amazing how much the body needs sleep and how violently it reminds you. Oh yeah, food. The body needs some of that too. Go figure. So since I was a zombie nightmare this weekend, I didn�t do shit. People called and I�d say in a zombie�fied voice �I�m not leaving this room��
Today a friend who called a few times during my stupor asked if I wanted to grab dinner, I had already committed myself to dinner with someone else. She was pissed. Why? Because I wasn�t extending any effort to be her friend. Or something like that.. uh.. right, how did this become about you? She has since called and apologized but still, how amazing. Granted, I haven�t seen her in forever and I was in a piss poor mood over the weekend but fuck, I hadn�t slept in 30 hours when she called and was a fucking wreck. I�m still a fucking wreck. Aren�t we all though, ha!
The absurdity of my situation: I�m not alone. I resent that, g�damnit! I can�t even be special and unique in my own damned misery. Fuck.
-G
P.S. I wonder if I�m capable of having sex while sober? Doubtful.
Diane Arbus