No sushi tonight. SAD FACE! But possibly tomorrow night. So I went to this french restaurant with an old friend. A skeleton served us. She had tight skin stretched over her bones, and well done make-up, lip-stick too. Wore very nice, expensive, shoes. She looked like a big fan of nouvella cuisine, a stylish anti-famine poster.
She treated us like rubbish, very french like, exactly what I was hoping for. I enjoy the full treatment, the entire experience. I ended up drinking mostly, nothing on the menu seemed too appealing after musing about the skeletal waitress. I shared in some baked brie. Tasty.
She had the same line I got the last time I went to a french restaurant, she asked �Would you like bottled spring water or.. (insert venomous snide voice here) ... tap water,� of course, I make a big deal about the tap water, much like I did last time. �Oh that tap water sounds simply divine, I think I�ll have a glass of that, if you can spare it. No bother the cost!� My performance was complete with the slightly homosexual hand gesturing. My friends melodic child like giggling accompanied the performance nicely. (I love her giggle, makes me think of warm spring days and playing in the water sprinklers as a child, oddly enough. I�m killing her husband and keeping her. *nods*)
Funny, I remember that glare of indignation. I didn�t think my sarcasm was that unwarranted, but I�m a stupid American, what the hell do I know? Fucking French.
Someone mind explaining to me why I have Dan Berns� � No missing link, playing on repeat for the last 45 minutes? Thanks Blaise. No, really.
Aliens came and fucked the monkey,
They fucked the monkey,
Fuck fucked the monkey.
It�s the small things that make life so enjoyable.
This whole unemployment thing is pretty fun. I think I�ll go see what being homeless is all about. Maybe I�ll spend a night or two in jail. I�ve never been to real jail, I�ve only been to �Juvy�. But at least I was taken there in cool un-marked black cars. And even though I was crying my head off at the time, I secretly thought I was the coolest kid on the block. I even told people that I couldn�t talk about what happened for the longest time, just to increase the drama and mystery of the event. I was a smart kid.
Aliens came and fucked the monkey,
They fucked the monkey,
Fuck fucked the monkey.
The more and more I think about this homeless idea, the more and more I like it. Can you imagine how much that�s going to suck ass? It�ll be great. I know, it�s probably not the most original idea in the world, but christ, there are no more original ideas. If you think that an idea is original, you�re just not well educated enough to know that it isn�t.
But this will be me being homeless. Where will I go to the bathroom? I�m anxious to figure that one out. So it�s new to me.
Okay so I changed Dan Berns. Er.. fuck, okay one more time. Then I�m listening to Tricky, damn it.
Aliens came and fucked the monkey,
They fucked the monkey,
Fuck fucked the monkey.
I had a dream last night of Paul with a SAIGA-410, pretty evil actually. Will leave one hell of a mess and a pile of paperwork. That�s what I get for watching TLC before going to bed. Bad Russian weapons development.
I need to sleep.
Shotguns and rose gardens,
-G